Men Are Pigs -- I mean, FDNY

Last night, the air conditioner at our workplace backfired and caused a billowing smoke right outside of our office. It prompted someone to dial 911. One of our co-workers rushed to take care of the ailing air conditioner which spewed its last cold breaths.

Suddenly, our heads turned to see the massive red trucks with red flashes rolling in on our street -- "Who called these damned FDNY?!" Char asked. I counted three trucks, Char shook her head and said, "Five." I grinned and rolled my eyes.

These massive, rugged looking, horny men from the local FDNY entered our office to check upon the air conditioner who died in a bang. I stood and cruised these men. I smirked, not because they re gods. I smirked, because they are idiots.

Why?

Since I moved to New York, I kept on hearing a lot of bad things about FDNY guys. Last December 31, 2003 -- one fireman whacked the other fireman with a metal chair in his face, and his team tried to cover it up. One fire truck crashed into a car, the FDNY driver was found to have cocaine in his body. One firehouse was busted for having lots of alcohol and drugs stashed in a locker. A FDNY Captain was busted for drinking during on-duty performance. There were 28 DWIs issued for FDNY firefighters since last year. Not only that, it was reported that more than 30 firefighters divorced their wives and married the widows of 9/11 FDNY firefighters few months after the 9/11 incident. Not a long time ago, there was a FDNY firefighter who beats up on NYPD cop for stopping his car in a traffic incident.

And last, the most recent scandal occured last Saturday when a female person (or dog?) reported to NYPD that she was gang-raped by 4 FDNY guys at Bronx firehouse (fittingly known as Animal House), prompted a confusing investigation that shockingly mentioned that this same female has some kind of obsessive fixatation with NYPD and FDNY guys since 9/11. It was reported that since 9/11, it is possible that she opened her legs for more than 200 FDNY & NYPD men, who were more than willing to insert their dirty, sooty dicks in a misguided, psychotic woman's vagina (or ass, who knows?).

The top FDNY Chief swears there will be many heads rolling right after the investigation is done. Mayor Bloomberg denounced this outrageous behavior. I laughed a little, too little action is being done, too late. Every month, I seem to hear Mayor Bloomberg denouncing a firefighter for doing this, that and there.

Rest assured, since 9/11, the FDNY capitalized on our massive pity and support and ever since, they tried to operate above the law or morality. Now they are falling apart, but how much apart will they finally hit? I'm still waiting.

Actually, I am waiting for the next scandal. It is more exciting this way.

Oh, by the way, FDNY firefighters, thanks for stopping by last night. It was surely candy for our eyes.

R-