Fire & Flood

The world is coming to an end, so says the Christians for the last 1,500 years. They were wrong, always had been wrong and always will be wrong.

On other hand, Tropical Storm Gaston battered South Carolina, North Carolina and Virginia before returning to the open sea, heading northeast into obscurity, missing Cape Cod.

Why am I talking about it? I love these crap.

And Tropical Storm Gaston dumped 11-inch of rain in a day, created a massive flood that devastated the historic Shockoe Bottom in downtown Richmond (Shockoe Bottom is like Georgetown/DuPont Circle). I was concerned about my parents because a tornado was reported to be located near Hopewell, my parents' hometown. I paged her and Dad to make sure that everything is OK.

Few months ago, there was a huge fire that consumed several blocks of downtown Richmond in Virginia Commonwealth University neighborhood. Now this flood. The signs are there! The world is coming to an end! Bush is the anti-christ! Whatever.

Anyway, Mom paged me back that everything is fine, except that she is in the hospital to visit my uncle Billy.

It reads: HELLO RICKY, WE VISTED BILLY AT HOSPITAL TODAY. HE IS DOING OK AS HE WILL HAVE SURGERY TOMORROW AT 11:45 AM TO REPAIR HIS MALE ORGAN. WILL VISIT HIM ON THURSDAY OR FRIDAY.

I asked, "Why repair his male organ? Did he cuts his penis off?"

HELLO RICKY, BILLY IS FINE. NOT PROSTATE NOT CANCER!! JUST PROBLEM WITH URINE HAVE LEAK NEED FIX DOC SAID SO. NEED REPAIR PENIS.

I asked, "Oh, ask Billy for the specific term that I can know why he is having a surgery, please?

HELLO RICKY, NO DONT NEED BOTHER BILLY. U THINK SMART FINISH!! HOME FINE, NO FLOOD. TORNADO HITS APPOMATTOX PARK, NOT OUR HOUSE!

I give up. That is my mother.

R-