This morning is plainly busy for me. I had to organize things around the office before I head off to Virginia today.
I had been observing my comments in the last few days. I noticed that I had been very abrasive and mean towards different people as well as being nice towards some people. I do not know why but I think the stress probably played a role in this. Work probably is a huge factor. But what made me going over the edge has to be Triple XXX Party. Rico mentioned that these men who engaged in massive orgies does not reflect the whole spectrum of gay community.
I am realistic, I'd like to be optimistic but I am realistic. I do not like to be optimistic *all* the time even with 10 seconds left, I knew I was going to lose but "let's be optimistic" ... that is bullshit. So being realistic is better than being optimistic, sometimes.
The reality is that promiscuity is huge in gay community. I'd love to date, marry and be content. I already met guys who are "committed" with each other but played outside as well. I already met guys who said he fucked 6 guys in a week. I went to gay.com chat rooms, practically *everyone else* wants to hook up one way or other. It is everywhere.
It makes me feel ... resigned to the vicious cycles of promiscuity.
It is nice to have close friends to chat on a daily basis but what I wanted is *one* person to contend with for the rest of my life. It seems to me that in gay community, it is impossible. My dear faggots, please do not comment something that I should think positive and something "will" happen. Someone already said that to me about ... 10 years ago.
But seeing Benis & Awon's pics are absolutely nice. It is nice to see them in love and contend with each other without humping all the time. Gay men needs to follow Awon and Benis' examples. And Larry & Kitch.
I'm gone for the weekend, you may go ahead and ignite the fireworks, NYCers.
R-
Thursday, June 03, 2004
Wednesday, June 02, 2004
Few Blogs To Check Out
I browsed two blogs and was amused by that. Steven and Michael's blogs are charming and funny. I can relate to Michael because he's from Kentucky (I'm from Virginia). Steven is just funny guy. It's not often that a hearing person gets to make me smile (actually, there are, though). Check 'em out on Hearies Section.
Not so amusing to read: I am such a loser because I am trying so hard to be straight but I am so faggot. Someone want to donate a shotgun to this guy?
There is another gay blogger that I read with disdain. All he talks is about fucking, HIV meds, snorting Crystal Meth and how sweet life is all about. It is so pessimistic that I feel he was asking me to come down to his area and finish him. I don't think it is worth the time to identify him on my own blogsite! So SYL to them!
Have fun blogging,
R-
P.S. Anyone volunteer to edit my huge pics -- I need to fix the pics before I post the pics of me, Rico, Yassine, Lee, Jayson and Corey.
Not so amusing to read: I am such a loser because I am trying so hard to be straight but I am so faggot. Someone want to donate a shotgun to this guy?
There is another gay blogger that I read with disdain. All he talks is about fucking, HIV meds, snorting Crystal Meth and how sweet life is all about. It is so pessimistic that I feel he was asking me to come down to his area and finish him. I don't think it is worth the time to identify him on my own blogsite! So SYL to them!
Have fun blogging,
R-
P.S. Anyone volunteer to edit my huge pics -- I need to fix the pics before I post the pics of me, Rico, Yassine, Lee, Jayson and Corey.
Tomorrow Is The Day!
Last night, I said: "How's ya?" to my hearing brother online. He snapped, "For an educated person, you trying to talk 'How's ya?' makes you sound like one of us here in Hopewell."
Hopewell is a small town in Virginia about 25 minutes southeast of Richmond, Virginia. That is the town where my parents and some siblings lived.
I responded, "I know. I am practicing the lowest standards possible in order to communicate with you and others when I get there on Thursday evening."
I'm pretty curious about the whole thing because ... it'll be my first time to see my parents since last year in January 2003. It will be my first time to be in Hopewell since last year in March 2003 when Marky and I drove through to Atlanta.
Ahh, yes, I got the pics from Travis. They're too big. I need some help to cut and crush them down to tiny pics. Jayson looks good as ever. But I look trashy as ever.
*sigh*
Will wonders never cease?
R-
Hopewell is a small town in Virginia about 25 minutes southeast of Richmond, Virginia. That is the town where my parents and some siblings lived.
I responded, "I know. I am practicing the lowest standards possible in order to communicate with you and others when I get there on Thursday evening."
I'm pretty curious about the whole thing because ... it'll be my first time to see my parents since last year in January 2003. It will be my first time to be in Hopewell since last year in March 2003 when Marky and I drove through to Atlanta.
Ahh, yes, I got the pics from Travis. They're too big. I need some help to cut and crush them down to tiny pics. Jayson looks good as ever. But I look trashy as ever.
*sigh*
Will wonders never cease?
R-
Tuesday, June 01, 2004
Honestly, This Is Silly
Yes, the Holocaust was a tragedy that happened in the past. We must never forget that. But to punish someone else for what happened more than 50 years ago? To strip the citizenship of an elderly person with no place to go except to a third world country is simply barbaric and wrong.
Many Germans were simply citizens who got caught up in the nationalism craze and fell for Hitler's stuff. But later, they realized they were wrong. And they probably regret and are dealing with it for the rest of their lives. Why continue to do a witchhunt and attack these elderly persons?
The Germans lost the war, they already repented. The peoples who were involved are paying for it with the images stucked on their minds until they die.
Enough is enough, let them go. Stop chasing after these people. Let things stay in the past. Don't be vengeful about it.
If we must make everyone pay for their sins, then nobody on this planet deserved to live as of now.
R-
Many Germans were simply citizens who got caught up in the nationalism craze and fell for Hitler's stuff. But later, they realized they were wrong. And they probably regret and are dealing with it for the rest of their lives. Why continue to do a witchhunt and attack these elderly persons?
The Germans lost the war, they already repented. The peoples who were involved are paying for it with the images stucked on their minds until they die.
Enough is enough, let them go. Stop chasing after these people. Let things stay in the past. Don't be vengeful about it.
If we must make everyone pay for their sins, then nobody on this planet deserved to live as of now.
R-
Captain-Obvious Is The Dumbfuck Loser!
He emailed me and told me to hear his response via the audio (.mp3), I wrote back that I have no interest in hearing or getting his comments to be heard.
The email was returned. He blocked me.
I won the whole thing, motherfucker.
Anyone who does that to anyone and gets away with it is often the bitter queen and decidedly a loser to start with.
Captain-Obvious and Tom Tricoli has something in common, they should date and exchange the bodily fluids for all I care -- at least, two hearies out of the picture.
R-
The email was returned. He blocked me.
I won the whole thing, motherfucker.
Anyone who does that to anyone and gets away with it is often the bitter queen and decidedly a loser to start with.
Captain-Obvious and Tom Tricoli has something in common, they should date and exchange the bodily fluids for all I care -- at least, two hearies out of the picture.
R-
Jayson, NYC and Triple XXX Equals Insanity!
Getting home at 4 AM to discover the mess that Rico and Yassine left in my bathtub is not something that I enjoyed but at least, I barked at them.
One thing I hated the most about the deaf drunks are that they tend to repeat the conversations and do it with exaggeration. Like, "I WALK WALK WALK TURN RIGHT THEN LEFT THEN SAW ..." instead of "TODAY I WALK THEN SAW ..."
But that was so funny, though.
On Sunday afternoon, we went to Crif Dog for Lee to munch some bacon-wrapped dogs then rushed to Washington Square Park. A mistake.
The park was filled with thousands of people. I was not sure if I can find Jayson in the midst of beautiful park. I told Rico, Yassine and Lee not to sign in front of Jayson so I could observe from afar. They refused to agree. There he is.
He looks good, he looks radiant, he looks sweet. He's all that. Giving free hugs. Rico and Yassine were fast up close to get a hug from Jayson. Lee snapped the pics. Suddenly, Jayson signed. It's cool. I was impressed. Then I came forward and identified myself. It was fun. When we talked, I noticed that there was a TV crew filming our conversation. Turns out that they are a crew from Germany. Extremely cool. So I guess I'll be seen on TV sets in Europe with Jayson.
Will pose the pics of Jayson stuff when I get some from Lee via emails later.
After that, took them to places like Stonewall, Chelsea Piers, The Dugout, Ty's and yeah, Ground Zero.
Later in the evening, we went to Triple XXX party at The Hole. Lee, Rico and Yassine were consistently amazed at the behaviors of gay men engaging in sex. Rico said, "Look at this guy, he just rimmed someone else then kissed someone different. Ew."
Ahh, I didn't think like that but he's right ... EW!
I asked Rico if he VEE-VEE the whole drama? He said, "NO, I quadrupled VEE-VEE the whole thing, I am afraid that if I approach my friends in Ohio this weekend, nobody will believe me. Nobody will believe me when I go back to Amsterdam."
Thanks to that party, the sexually transmitted infections probably doubled the numbers. Something that will keep GMHC (Gay Men's Health Clinic) busy for a long, long and long time. I saw guys' facial expressions in the dungeon and in the main floor, it is borderline of animalistic behavior. Scary, weird and crazy.
No, I did not do anything bad except drinking and observing all night long. Besides, who wants to touch me?
The next day, Lee, Yassine and Rico were pretty exhausted and still talked about the whole ordeal at the Triple XXX party.
Either way, it was good to be with my friends once again. Now I have to figure out a way how to bait Jayson into my arms again. ;-)
Cheers,
R-
One thing I hated the most about the deaf drunks are that they tend to repeat the conversations and do it with exaggeration. Like, "I WALK WALK WALK TURN RIGHT THEN LEFT THEN SAW ..." instead of "TODAY I WALK THEN SAW ..."
But that was so funny, though.
On Sunday afternoon, we went to Crif Dog for Lee to munch some bacon-wrapped dogs then rushed to Washington Square Park. A mistake.
The park was filled with thousands of people. I was not sure if I can find Jayson in the midst of beautiful park. I told Rico, Yassine and Lee not to sign in front of Jayson so I could observe from afar. They refused to agree. There he is.
He looks good, he looks radiant, he looks sweet. He's all that. Giving free hugs. Rico and Yassine were fast up close to get a hug from Jayson. Lee snapped the pics. Suddenly, Jayson signed. It's cool. I was impressed. Then I came forward and identified myself. It was fun. When we talked, I noticed that there was a TV crew filming our conversation. Turns out that they are a crew from Germany. Extremely cool. So I guess I'll be seen on TV sets in Europe with Jayson.
Will pose the pics of Jayson stuff when I get some from Lee via emails later.
After that, took them to places like Stonewall, Chelsea Piers, The Dugout, Ty's and yeah, Ground Zero.
Later in the evening, we went to Triple XXX party at The Hole. Lee, Rico and Yassine were consistently amazed at the behaviors of gay men engaging in sex. Rico said, "Look at this guy, he just rimmed someone else then kissed someone different. Ew."
Ahh, I didn't think like that but he's right ... EW!
I asked Rico if he VEE-VEE the whole drama? He said, "NO, I quadrupled VEE-VEE the whole thing, I am afraid that if I approach my friends in Ohio this weekend, nobody will believe me. Nobody will believe me when I go back to Amsterdam."
Thanks to that party, the sexually transmitted infections probably doubled the numbers. Something that will keep GMHC (Gay Men's Health Clinic) busy for a long, long and long time. I saw guys' facial expressions in the dungeon and in the main floor, it is borderline of animalistic behavior. Scary, weird and crazy.
No, I did not do anything bad except drinking and observing all night long. Besides, who wants to touch me?
The next day, Lee, Yassine and Rico were pretty exhausted and still talked about the whole ordeal at the Triple XXX party.
Either way, it was good to be with my friends once again. Now I have to figure out a way how to bait Jayson into my arms again. ;-)
Cheers,
R-
No Time To Sleep
Last Friday night, I was able to get some sleep while Rico, Yassine and Web went out to loiter a little. But it was only an hour and half of sleep. After that, I found the keys. Went to meet them at some coffeehouse on 1st Avenue. We went to a restaurant in Soho.
It was a low-key tone that we approached this time before the bang that occurs over the weekend. Call it the calm before the storm.
What a fun it was to be part of the storm.
What a fun it was to be stimulated and laughed all over the weekend.
After that restaurant, we strolled throughout the Washington Square Park to The Cock Bar. I reminded myself and others that this place is where Jayson gives the free hugs. That we have to check it out on Sunday afternoon. Rico, himself from Amsterdam, was not aware about what I was talking about. After some explanations about the free hugger, Rico exclaimed: I MUST SEE IT!
The Cock was packed, rude and abrasive. We decided to ditch it and head out to The Phoenix where it was nice to be able to sit, drink and crack jokes about our lives so far.
We got home very late around 5:30 AM. And we yakked 'til like 6:30 AM, I yelled at them that I had to go to bed.
I woke up at 2 PM the next day with my pager vibrating (not in my ass, thank you very much) on the mattress. It was off to Chinatown to pick Lee (Not that Forbit or Mississippi guy).
Catching up with Lee at Nowhere Bar, Better Burger, XL and The Slide Bar was a blessing, really as Rico and Yassine went on their own rampage around the island. They ended up getting drunk at my home and made a mess. That's OK, though.
There were some pics that were taken by Lee which I will share as soon as I receive from him via emails. The pics of our weekend was very interesting and wonderful. I get to be with my friends and acquaintenances, that is absolutely nicest thing.
More on Sunday & Jayson later!
R-
It was a low-key tone that we approached this time before the bang that occurs over the weekend. Call it the calm before the storm.
What a fun it was to be part of the storm.
What a fun it was to be stimulated and laughed all over the weekend.
After that restaurant, we strolled throughout the Washington Square Park to The Cock Bar. I reminded myself and others that this place is where Jayson gives the free hugs. That we have to check it out on Sunday afternoon. Rico, himself from Amsterdam, was not aware about what I was talking about. After some explanations about the free hugger, Rico exclaimed: I MUST SEE IT!
The Cock was packed, rude and abrasive. We decided to ditch it and head out to The Phoenix where it was nice to be able to sit, drink and crack jokes about our lives so far.
We got home very late around 5:30 AM. And we yakked 'til like 6:30 AM, I yelled at them that I had to go to bed.
I woke up at 2 PM the next day with my pager vibrating (not in my ass, thank you very much) on the mattress. It was off to Chinatown to pick Lee (Not that Forbit or Mississippi guy).
Catching up with Lee at Nowhere Bar, Better Burger, XL and The Slide Bar was a blessing, really as Rico and Yassine went on their own rampage around the island. They ended up getting drunk at my home and made a mess. That's OK, though.
There were some pics that were taken by Lee which I will share as soon as I receive from him via emails. The pics of our weekend was very interesting and wonderful. I get to be with my friends and acquaintenances, that is absolutely nicest thing.
More on Sunday & Jayson later!
R-
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