Last night, I had an interesting dream about the first guy I ever loved, Todd. We were together for two and half years until he freaked out when his parents became suspicious of our relationship, Todd dumped me and went ahead with a girl.
Of course, I was heartbroken at that time. I was young. About 20.
Anyway, in my dream, Todd and I somehow met on the streets of New York. For some reasons, we went to kaybee & Sarah's building on 11 Avenue in Hell's Kitchen. When we entered the premise, the interior design compares to the ones I saw in The Hole and The Cock. Todd said something about missing me. When we wandered inside the building, we bumped into Corey, believe it or not. Then he told me that there is a secret staircase to the apartment upstairs where I can spend some solace with Todd.
We went there. It was nice and serene. We talked, then Todd wanted to buy some drinks -- he had to go through downstairs to get outside. Apparently, he got lost in the building -- I looked all over the place.
Then I returned to the apartment upstairs to find him sleeping on the bed nude, apparently, he found his way around and was waiting for me. But fell asleep. I was nude in a nanosecond and slipped into the bed, embracing him as hard as can be.
It felt so real. He smells good, too.
My dream was shattered as I was jolted by Woody, my roommate's cat, who jumped on me and whined for the attention. Sigh.
After few hours, I still cannot remove the thoughts of Todd today, for some reasons unknown to me.
Maybe I do love him.
I don't know.
R-
Saturday, March 12, 2005
Few Thoughts
My lump on my left shoulder is on fire. Argh. That's it. I'm going to see the doc about it.
I had been thinking about this for a while. I may move to Philadelphia sooner than you think and start to work on set up my own business somewhere by Delaware River near New Hope, hopefully by this year or next year. I'd like to start it as soon as can be ... because I'm 31 already. Since New Hope is affluent community that is popular with gays, I think it is sensible that I set up the inn there because it can attract people from Boston to the District ... you know, I like rivers, I like lakes, I like hills and mountains. New Hope has that.
I cannot wait for a man to sweep me off the floor and work together -- I'll do it myself. Fuck 'em. They are not reliable, anyway! Hearing gay men are not reliable, trust me. I hadn't yet to find one who is reliable.
I have a weird thought -- what if X-ians died and went to Heaven only to find out that it's empty. Nobody is around. Yes, there is Heaven but nobody is there. Nobody at all. That would kill X-ians for sure.
At 6 AM on TBS Channel every morning, I enjoyed watching "Mama's Family" -- it is an old sitcom that I heard but never saw until recently. I must admit that I am impressed with its snappy comments, especially with Mama. I must admit that I try to get up at 6 AM so I can watch it then go back to bed at 7 AM. Betty White and Rue McClanahan used to act in the sitcom before they migrated to The Golden Girls.
Ahh, it's still snowing here in Manhattan.
To entertain you about Republicans' belief, enjoy this.
R-
I had been thinking about this for a while. I may move to Philadelphia sooner than you think and start to work on set up my own business somewhere by Delaware River near New Hope, hopefully by this year or next year. I'd like to start it as soon as can be ... because I'm 31 already. Since New Hope is affluent community that is popular with gays, I think it is sensible that I set up the inn there because it can attract people from Boston to the District ... you know, I like rivers, I like lakes, I like hills and mountains. New Hope has that.
I cannot wait for a man to sweep me off the floor and work together -- I'll do it myself. Fuck 'em. They are not reliable, anyway! Hearing gay men are not reliable, trust me. I hadn't yet to find one who is reliable.
I have a weird thought -- what if X-ians died and went to Heaven only to find out that it's empty. Nobody is around. Yes, there is Heaven but nobody is there. Nobody at all. That would kill X-ians for sure.
At 6 AM on TBS Channel every morning, I enjoyed watching "Mama's Family" -- it is an old sitcom that I heard but never saw until recently. I must admit that I am impressed with its snappy comments, especially with Mama. I must admit that I try to get up at 6 AM so I can watch it then go back to bed at 7 AM. Betty White and Rue McClanahan used to act in the sitcom before they migrated to The Golden Girls.
Ahh, it's still snowing here in Manhattan.
To entertain you about Republicans' belief, enjoy this.
R-
Friday, March 11, 2005
Being Gay Does Not Mean I'm Happy
When Surdus relented you to hang out with him at a bar, it is pretty difficult to resist his persistence. He can persist until he gets what he wanted. With my left knee recuperating from the fall last Monday night, I resisted until Surdus said that Norbert is driving. I caved in. Then my roommate, Perlis, resisted. Then she caved in. Off to SBNY last Wednesday night.
Driving to SBNY was uneventful, though. But Norbert is classic New York driver, rattled me several times as he twirled his minivan cross the island to Chelsea. Raising my hair is not attractive.
At SBNY, we met Web and chatted amongst each other for few hours -- we get to VEE VEE at a birthday boy who ordered the jockstrap-only bartenders to get on the counter and drain the alcohol on his chest so that the birthday boy can guzzle on his bellybutton.
SBNY is getting sleazy.
It was time to go home, my leg was acting funny. And I was hungry for a slice of pizza. So I went across the street to Ray's Pizza where I was greeted by a studmuffin who remembered me at The Hole. Frankly, I cannot remember who he is. He said, "You did not email me."
D-oh. Sorry. My fault. Honest mistake, I think.
Surdus, Web, Perlis and Norbert stared in amazement because this studmuffin is ... one da bomb.
Then he gave me his email address and said, "Email me, please!"
I smiled and nodded.
He left the premise as I picked up the pizza then went back home. Surdus remarked, "I knew RT is a slut!"
Yeah, whatever.
Can you guess who this is?
The hint is that he is Roger Desmarais' twin brother. That boy has the guts to do that in Toronto Pride Parade. Wonder if he left a skid mark on his underwear for the world to see?
R-
Driving to SBNY was uneventful, though. But Norbert is classic New York driver, rattled me several times as he twirled his minivan cross the island to Chelsea. Raising my hair is not attractive.
At SBNY, we met Web and chatted amongst each other for few hours -- we get to VEE VEE at a birthday boy who ordered the jockstrap-only bartenders to get on the counter and drain the alcohol on his chest so that the birthday boy can guzzle on his bellybutton.
SBNY is getting sleazy.
It was time to go home, my leg was acting funny. And I was hungry for a slice of pizza. So I went across the street to Ray's Pizza where I was greeted by a studmuffin who remembered me at The Hole. Frankly, I cannot remember who he is. He said, "You did not email me."
D-oh. Sorry. My fault. Honest mistake, I think.
Surdus, Web, Perlis and Norbert stared in amazement because this studmuffin is ... one da bomb.
Then he gave me his email address and said, "Email me, please!"
I smiled and nodded.
He left the premise as I picked up the pizza then went back home. Surdus remarked, "I knew RT is a slut!"
Yeah, whatever.
Can you guess who this is?
The hint is that he is Roger Desmarais' twin brother. That boy has the guts to do that in Toronto Pride Parade. Wonder if he left a skid mark on his underwear for the world to see?
R-
Thursday, March 10, 2005
Stallard, Bartelstein, Flynn, Google, Suggs ...
Stallard: Had been reading The Tactile Mind Weekly for a while. Sometimes it is boring, sometimes it is interesting. I must give few rounds of applause to Sara Stallard's articles which was written not with English but with ASL. It was quite entertaining to read. When I fail to understand one, all I have to do is to sign it and voila! I get it! Fun! Fun! Me *kissfist* Sara ASL articles yes! Y-e-s!
Flynn: In the latest issue of TTMW, Flynn wrote about the competition between Japan and the United States in almost everything, including Deaf issues. Japan is doing very well because they share, teach and work with others. Here in the United States, we are so good at beating each other up. But did we make efforts to reach out with each other so far? No, not really.
Bartelstein: I cannot stand Steve Bartelstein's smirks! When I see him on the tube, I immediately changed the channel. There is something about his smirks that made me groan.
Google: As you can see above, I got the google search engine on my blog. Feel free to use it anytime. It works very well. If you do it occasionally, I may make some money out of it. Nice?
Suggs: Check her blog about her experience with the cops related to the speeding ticket. I cannot blame her. It happened to me one time before when I was driving to my parents' home from Little Rock, Arkansas. It was around 4 AM in the morning on Interstate 85 not far from the state of North Carolina, there was a 18-wheel truck on my right side, I was going 70 on 65 MPH, trying to pass the 18-wheeler on my own time.
Suddenly, a car with bright headlights appeared out of nowhere and came straight to my back. It flipped the headlights to signal to move away. To increase the speed so that I can pass the truck so that car can pass me. I attempted to resist, the car kept on coming closer then back then closer -- sort of a fendbender situation at 4 AM! I decided to go up to 75 MPH and finally passed the truck. Suddenly, the car behind me was a fucking state trooper -- busted me and pulled me off the road. Refused to communicate with me with paper and pen -- drama, drama, drama -- I argued that he provoked me and pushed me to rush ahead. I grabbed a paperpad and took note of his name and badge number. He covered his badge! He fucking covered his badge! I glared at him. I fucking hate hearie pigs. Either way, he realized that I'm not someone to be fucked with -- he lets me go. Ever since, I hated the fucking hearing pigs. Do not fucking trust them!
R-
Flynn: In the latest issue of TTMW, Flynn wrote about the competition between Japan and the United States in almost everything, including Deaf issues. Japan is doing very well because they share, teach and work with others. Here in the United States, we are so good at beating each other up. But did we make efforts to reach out with each other so far? No, not really.
Bartelstein: I cannot stand Steve Bartelstein's smirks! When I see him on the tube, I immediately changed the channel. There is something about his smirks that made me groan.
Google: As you can see above, I got the google search engine on my blog. Feel free to use it anytime. It works very well. If you do it occasionally, I may make some money out of it. Nice?
Suggs: Check her blog about her experience with the cops related to the speeding ticket. I cannot blame her. It happened to me one time before when I was driving to my parents' home from Little Rock, Arkansas. It was around 4 AM in the morning on Interstate 85 not far from the state of North Carolina, there was a 18-wheel truck on my right side, I was going 70 on 65 MPH, trying to pass the 18-wheeler on my own time.
Suddenly, a car with bright headlights appeared out of nowhere and came straight to my back. It flipped the headlights to signal to move away. To increase the speed so that I can pass the truck so that car can pass me. I attempted to resist, the car kept on coming closer then back then closer -- sort of a fendbender situation at 4 AM! I decided to go up to 75 MPH and finally passed the truck. Suddenly, the car behind me was a fucking state trooper -- busted me and pulled me off the road. Refused to communicate with me with paper and pen -- drama, drama, drama -- I argued that he provoked me and pushed me to rush ahead. I grabbed a paperpad and took note of his name and badge number. He covered his badge! He fucking covered his badge! I glared at him. I fucking hate hearie pigs. Either way, he realized that I'm not someone to be fucked with -- he lets me go. Ever since, I hated the fucking hearing pigs. Do not fucking trust them!
R-
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
Lance Allred of Weber State
Category: Sports
Lance Allred, a basketball player at Weber State who is deaf, is a starter for 14-15 team that reached the finals of their conference tournament versus Montana Grizzlies. They are vying for a berth to play in the NCAA Tournament.
If Weber State wins the conference championship, Lance will be one of few Deaf players ever to play the Division I NCAA Basketball Tournament. He also played for US Deaf Basketball team as well.
Lance is cute and big at 6'11.
Check him out.
UPDATE: Weber State lost to Montana 63-61 in the Big Sky Conference Championship, closed out the season at 14-16. Lance is denied of an opportunity to play in the NCAA Tournament. Lance Allred had 21 points and 12 rebounds for Weber State.
Give him a round of applause for his efforts.
Lance Allred in Dark Blue
R-
Lance Allred, a basketball player at Weber State who is deaf, is a starter for 14-15 team that reached the finals of their conference tournament versus Montana Grizzlies. They are vying for a berth to play in the NCAA Tournament.
If Weber State wins the conference championship, Lance will be one of few Deaf players ever to play the Division I NCAA Basketball Tournament. He also played for US Deaf Basketball team as well.
Lance is cute and big at 6'11.
Check him out.
UPDATE: Weber State lost to Montana 63-61 in the Big Sky Conference Championship, closed out the season at 14-16. Lance is denied of an opportunity to play in the NCAA Tournament. Lance Allred had 21 points and 12 rebounds for Weber State.
Give him a round of applause for his efforts.
R-
Whose Fault Is It?
Look at the big picture.
Afghanistan
When the Soviet Union invaded Afghanistan, GW Bush's father, GHW Bush was the Director of Central Intelligence Agency (CIA). GHW Bush funnelled the money to sponsor the local guerllias with arms and logistics support. For more than a decade, the whole system of Afghanistan was destroyed. Transportation, economy, education and health services were in ruins.
The Afghans literally destroyed itself in order to expel the Soviets. When they finally left the country, the CIA disappeared as if it never existed. The Afghans were left with a country in ruins. GHW Bush, as Director of CIA, as Vice-President under Reagan and as President of the United states, did not bother to ask Congress for money to help Afghanistan to rebuild the country. He simply abandoned Afghanistan.
When Afghanistan was in ruins and disarray, the morale was very low. When the CIA chose not to do a thing, it created a power vacuum for anyone to sweep a country under its controls. It created an open powerplay for anyone else to wage -- hell, I could band a group and overtake Afghanistan -- you only have to take control of Kabul, Kandahar and two other cities, ping! I rule Afghanistan.
Who had the finances and arms to run in Afghanistan with the blessing of Pakistan? Taliban.
Back then, the US had economic sanctions on Pakistan, who in turn backed Taliban for Afghanistan. Then our government decided to sanction Afghanistan and Pakistan. Most of people in Afghanistan were already strafed with low morale, high unemployment, high mortality rate and devastating economy, they viewed the Americans as the ones who betryaed them in the first place, allowing Taliban to win Afghanistan then to impose the sanctions on Afghans.
The result is what? The Talbian allowed Osama bin Laden to host the trainings in Afghanistan to spit back at the US for its policies. And the result is what? They accomplished the act of terrorism on us in Somalia, Yemen, Saudi Arabia, Spain, Kenya, Tanzania and last, New York City.
Iraq
When GHW Bush was the Director of CIA, he also backed Saddam Hussein with funds and arms to battle Iran who had a revolution against the corrupted Shah of Iran. Thousands of people were dead. Later, Saddam turned against the neighbors and alienated the world.
Today, we are trying to stabilize the problems in the Middle East and dealing with nearly 3,000 dead from 9/11, 1,500 US troops dead ... as well as destroying Taliban and free Afghanistan (but not to mention the devastating effects on everything in Afghanistan).
It took a son to clean up the mess produced by a father. The fault lies with GHW Bush. His foreign policies are dismal, to say the least. GHW Bush basically produced Al-Qaeda and groomed Osama bin Laden for the world to deal with.
On other note: Did you know that in South America, lots of people are wearing Osama bin Laden t-shirts? They do. And all countries in South America is *not* Muslim. They are all Catholic!! Why? It is not about the "freedom" or "terrorism" -- it is how we treated others with condescending attitude.
Which is what Ann Coulter denied from day one. She will immediately accuse you of being unpatriotic and liberal if you object to the policies that does not favor both sides. It's like in 1950s, if you do not speak nice of Americans, you are communist!
It is absurd idea of Ann to bark.
Anyway, back to the big picture, if you look at the problems in the Middle East, it all started with GHW Bush in 1960s. Go figure.
R-
Afghanistan
When the Soviet Union invaded Afghanistan, GW Bush's father, GHW Bush was the Director of Central Intelligence Agency (CIA). GHW Bush funnelled the money to sponsor the local guerllias with arms and logistics support. For more than a decade, the whole system of Afghanistan was destroyed. Transportation, economy, education and health services were in ruins.
The Afghans literally destroyed itself in order to expel the Soviets. When they finally left the country, the CIA disappeared as if it never existed. The Afghans were left with a country in ruins. GHW Bush, as Director of CIA, as Vice-President under Reagan and as President of the United states, did not bother to ask Congress for money to help Afghanistan to rebuild the country. He simply abandoned Afghanistan.
When Afghanistan was in ruins and disarray, the morale was very low. When the CIA chose not to do a thing, it created a power vacuum for anyone to sweep a country under its controls. It created an open powerplay for anyone else to wage -- hell, I could band a group and overtake Afghanistan -- you only have to take control of Kabul, Kandahar and two other cities, ping! I rule Afghanistan.
Who had the finances and arms to run in Afghanistan with the blessing of Pakistan? Taliban.
Back then, the US had economic sanctions on Pakistan, who in turn backed Taliban for Afghanistan. Then our government decided to sanction Afghanistan and Pakistan. Most of people in Afghanistan were already strafed with low morale, high unemployment, high mortality rate and devastating economy, they viewed the Americans as the ones who betryaed them in the first place, allowing Taliban to win Afghanistan then to impose the sanctions on Afghans.
The result is what? The Talbian allowed Osama bin Laden to host the trainings in Afghanistan to spit back at the US for its policies. And the result is what? They accomplished the act of terrorism on us in Somalia, Yemen, Saudi Arabia, Spain, Kenya, Tanzania and last, New York City.
Iraq
When GHW Bush was the Director of CIA, he also backed Saddam Hussein with funds and arms to battle Iran who had a revolution against the corrupted Shah of Iran. Thousands of people were dead. Later, Saddam turned against the neighbors and alienated the world.
Today, we are trying to stabilize the problems in the Middle East and dealing with nearly 3,000 dead from 9/11, 1,500 US troops dead ... as well as destroying Taliban and free Afghanistan (but not to mention the devastating effects on everything in Afghanistan).
It took a son to clean up the mess produced by a father. The fault lies with GHW Bush. His foreign policies are dismal, to say the least. GHW Bush basically produced Al-Qaeda and groomed Osama bin Laden for the world to deal with.
On other note: Did you know that in South America, lots of people are wearing Osama bin Laden t-shirts? They do. And all countries in South America is *not* Muslim. They are all Catholic!! Why? It is not about the "freedom" or "terrorism" -- it is how we treated others with condescending attitude.
Which is what Ann Coulter denied from day one. She will immediately accuse you of being unpatriotic and liberal if you object to the policies that does not favor both sides. It's like in 1950s, if you do not speak nice of Americans, you are communist!
It is absurd idea of Ann to bark.
Anyway, back to the big picture, if you look at the problems in the Middle East, it all started with GHW Bush in 1960s. Go figure.
R-
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Great Way To Go Out
Last night, I lost the balance and my left knee gave away. It was painful. I'm still hobbling around.
My computer sucked lately.
I got a card from a certain reader who said she enjoyed my blogs as of lately. Thanks, Chlms.
Either way, I'm back.
R-
My computer sucked lately.
I got a card from a certain reader who said she enjoyed my blogs as of lately. Thanks, Chlms.
Either way, I'm back.
R-
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