Yesterday, Char talked about how uncomfortable it is to stand next to the Funeral Home, waiting for the city bus to come by on 1st Avenue and Houston Street. I agreed wholeheartedly!!
One time I was standing, waiting for the bus. A small coffin was hauled out of the Funeral Home with lots of distraught people. Some wailed hysterically. Some slapped on their heads, screamed on the top of the lungs. A mother was cradling the white coffin as it rolls into a station wagon en route to the cemetary, probably.
I was next to the whole thing. It was so uncomfortable. I tried to look at the street but the body movements, the screams, the wails, the glares were too much. I turned to look at lots of people who were waiting for the city bus. They were also uncomfortable about they were also very tough. They acted like the coffin is not there.
I want to enamate something to let them know that I acknowledge and am sorry but at the same time, respect their privacy. But it is at the bus stop, very difficult.
The city is dumb to put it down.
Any suggestions how to behave in front of the Funeral Home at the city bus stop?
Again, this only happens in New York.
R-
Thursday, April 29, 2004
Wednesday, April 28, 2004
ASL Thing ...
I was supposed to meet Jan today at 6 PM, I tried my best to get to Christopher Park on time but I was late. Jan left for home. He wanted me to come to his place in New Jersey for the weekend.
My first concern is to haul all of my stuff out by April 30th or at least, May 1st. Then after that, I do not care.
A certain friend is coming up my way this weekend as well. Then on Sunday, we might visit the legendary Triple XXX Event.
I went to the GLBT Center to check up with the NYCASLCLUB, a social club for hearing people to learn and improve the signs with deaf people. It was nice and mellow. Saw few familiar faces. Suddenly, my eyes targeted one cute hearing dude. I had to check him out. Ahh, name is Emerson. I'll keep it quiet for the time being.
Otherwise, it was a quiet day -- the calm before the storm ... the issue is transportation. Oh, god.
Ahh, I'm going to add someone new to the Friends' list. Deansworld, welcome!
R-
My first concern is to haul all of my stuff out by April 30th or at least, May 1st. Then after that, I do not care.
A certain friend is coming up my way this weekend as well. Then on Sunday, we might visit the legendary Triple XXX Event.
I went to the GLBT Center to check up with the NYCASLCLUB, a social club for hearing people to learn and improve the signs with deaf people. It was nice and mellow. Saw few familiar faces. Suddenly, my eyes targeted one cute hearing dude. I had to check him out. Ahh, name is Emerson. I'll keep it quiet for the time being.
Otherwise, it was a quiet day -- the calm before the storm ... the issue is transportation. Oh, god.
Ahh, I'm going to add someone new to the Friends' list. Deansworld, welcome!
R-
Paternalism II
Some comments made an excellent discussion on the blighting of deaf schools and the ones that may undo the concept of a deaf school system is none other than the abuses deaf children absorbed in the last 50 to 100 years.
Some complained that the deaf schools are not willing to address this subject. One said that even deaf administrators were part of the 'plot' to sweep things under the carpet. Blah, blah. I know what you guys meant by that! I agreed and guess what? I disagreed, too.
Most deaf schools are already shackled with funds being cut at an alarming rate. If they publicly talked about it, the negative image will send the message to the state whom in turn will find ways to obliterate the deaf schools by cutting the funds. Which is why they often did not address this. They simply do *not* know how to deal with this without getting the fierce attacks by pro-mainstreaming folks, who lobbied the government to shut the deaf schools down.
One good example is ... Washington State School for the Deaf. They hired a new superintendent who is Deaf and he addressed the sexual abuses that occured at the school prior to his arrival. There was an uproar in Olympia and Seattle that threatens to alter the fundings of the school, just because the Superintendent decides to confront the issues! The state government attempted to blame the Superintendent for causing these sexual abuses that occured BEFORE the Superintendent got to Vancouver!! This is absurd but is it unique? No. Very common.
Now to Mike's argument about deaf administrators sweeping under the carpet to keep it quiet ... you could say that to pinpoint the blame. But does it makes sense? No. Let's use the analogy of a college basketball team. Say, if Duke under the direction of Coach K violated many NCAA rules in terms of distributing money, cars et al. Then he got retired. Then a new coach comes in trying to make his program look good realized that he has the violations in his hands left by Coach K ... this mess could tarnish the new coach's reputation and put the team on probation for some years. Often the coach will try to sweep it under the carpet, to protect the university, team and himself.
But is it their fault? No. The same concept applies to many deaf administrators who are enthusiastic to take over only to find the mess in their hands, they became unsure what to do. They knew that if they publicly addressed this, he will be scorned, tarnished and mauled by the hearing folks in the government. Instead, some deaf administrators swept the carpet with no choice.
This boils to the whole bottom of the problems -- hearing people. Paternalism. For decades, hearing people took advantage of us because they knew that nobody would believe us. Nobody would take us seriously. Nobody would say anything, really. In 1950s, you got two applicants -- Deaf and hearing, hearing person is always hired on the spot. Deaf person has to fight his way around to make a living. It was difficult enough to get someone to listen to us back then.
Now with the DPN's impact on the society of Deaf communities, we suddenly have the access to these opportunities to take over these schools. Only to face the horrors.
So we just cannot blame some deaf administrators for trying to sweep it under the carpet, they were dumped with these mess on their hands and of course, they are unsure, scared and extremely worried about their careers, lives and funds for their schools.
So blame on deaf administrators are not fair, in my opinion. Blame it all on the Superintendents & Principals that ruled the deaf schools with an iron prior to the DPN Movement. They were the ones who are responsible. Of course, the majority of these are none other than hearing people.
R-
Some complained that the deaf schools are not willing to address this subject. One said that even deaf administrators were part of the 'plot' to sweep things under the carpet. Blah, blah. I know what you guys meant by that! I agreed and guess what? I disagreed, too.
Most deaf schools are already shackled with funds being cut at an alarming rate. If they publicly talked about it, the negative image will send the message to the state whom in turn will find ways to obliterate the deaf schools by cutting the funds. Which is why they often did not address this. They simply do *not* know how to deal with this without getting the fierce attacks by pro-mainstreaming folks, who lobbied the government to shut the deaf schools down.
One good example is ... Washington State School for the Deaf. They hired a new superintendent who is Deaf and he addressed the sexual abuses that occured at the school prior to his arrival. There was an uproar in Olympia and Seattle that threatens to alter the fundings of the school, just because the Superintendent decides to confront the issues! The state government attempted to blame the Superintendent for causing these sexual abuses that occured BEFORE the Superintendent got to Vancouver!! This is absurd but is it unique? No. Very common.
Now to Mike's argument about deaf administrators sweeping under the carpet to keep it quiet ... you could say that to pinpoint the blame. But does it makes sense? No. Let's use the analogy of a college basketball team. Say, if Duke under the direction of Coach K violated many NCAA rules in terms of distributing money, cars et al. Then he got retired. Then a new coach comes in trying to make his program look good realized that he has the violations in his hands left by Coach K ... this mess could tarnish the new coach's reputation and put the team on probation for some years. Often the coach will try to sweep it under the carpet, to protect the university, team and himself.
But is it their fault? No. The same concept applies to many deaf administrators who are enthusiastic to take over only to find the mess in their hands, they became unsure what to do. They knew that if they publicly addressed this, he will be scorned, tarnished and mauled by the hearing folks in the government. Instead, some deaf administrators swept the carpet with no choice.
This boils to the whole bottom of the problems -- hearing people. Paternalism. For decades, hearing people took advantage of us because they knew that nobody would believe us. Nobody would take us seriously. Nobody would say anything, really. In 1950s, you got two applicants -- Deaf and hearing, hearing person is always hired on the spot. Deaf person has to fight his way around to make a living. It was difficult enough to get someone to listen to us back then.
Now with the DPN's impact on the society of Deaf communities, we suddenly have the access to these opportunities to take over these schools. Only to face the horrors.
So we just cannot blame some deaf administrators for trying to sweep it under the carpet, they were dumped with these mess on their hands and of course, they are unsure, scared and extremely worried about their careers, lives and funds for their schools.
So blame on deaf administrators are not fair, in my opinion. Blame it all on the Superintendents & Principals that ruled the deaf schools with an iron prior to the DPN Movement. They were the ones who are responsible. Of course, the majority of these are none other than hearing people.
R-
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
Paternalism
According to the website, dictionary.com, Paternalism is: A policy or practice of treating or governing people in a fatherly manner, especially by providing for their needs without giving them rights or responsibilities.
For many years, many deaf schools were practically ruled by hearing administrators, houseparents, teachers, maintenance men and even, kitchen staff. Even they hired some deaf people to work at deaf schools, they tend to be very passive in order to keep their job security going on. So their voices in shaping Deaf children's lives were largely muted for more than 100 years, thanks to the god-damned Milan Conference of 1880.
Naturally, over the long period of time, the seeds of darkness were planted. The powers that the hearies has over deaf children often led to different types of abuses. Be it physical, verbal and yes, sexual. It hindered many deaf people to perpetuate the problems onto each other for the rest of their lives -- because it is the only way they knew how to deal with each other through that manner.
My deaf school was not different from any schools, really. I am not aware that a hearing person taking advantage of a deaf child. It is more of deaf student on deaf student. I suspected it began in 1940s when someone (probably a hearie) touched or molested a deaf child -- then a deaf child thought it was OK as he touched the other kids at my school -- so the cycle of "touching, forelpay and eventually, anal sex" has whirled for 40 years. I asked my father about this, he was quick enough to deny this -- that "quick enough to deny" is the reason why I strongly suspect it occured during that period ...
In 1988, the Deaf President Now Movement exploded in Washington, DC -- its ripple effect in Deaf empowerment shook the foundations of Deaf schools' systems across the nation. The social impact from the Movement jolted the Deaf communities across the globe that one has to stand up and kick the hearies back to the corner and take over what is rightfully ours.
More and more Deaf persons are taking over the higher positions and changed the policies that meets the deaf students' needs, not hearies' needs. Slowly, the secrets of the abuses began to emerge from the darkness. It is not pretty sight.
But at least, Governor Baxter School for the Deaf in Portland, Maine is doing something about it.
Check this link. Dr. Robert Kelly I s Going To Hell!
It is interesting to see the picture of cheering alumnus. Very liberating experience, I bet.
R-
For many years, many deaf schools were practically ruled by hearing administrators, houseparents, teachers, maintenance men and even, kitchen staff. Even they hired some deaf people to work at deaf schools, they tend to be very passive in order to keep their job security going on. So their voices in shaping Deaf children's lives were largely muted for more than 100 years, thanks to the god-damned Milan Conference of 1880.
Naturally, over the long period of time, the seeds of darkness were planted. The powers that the hearies has over deaf children often led to different types of abuses. Be it physical, verbal and yes, sexual. It hindered many deaf people to perpetuate the problems onto each other for the rest of their lives -- because it is the only way they knew how to deal with each other through that manner.
My deaf school was not different from any schools, really. I am not aware that a hearing person taking advantage of a deaf child. It is more of deaf student on deaf student. I suspected it began in 1940s when someone (probably a hearie) touched or molested a deaf child -- then a deaf child thought it was OK as he touched the other kids at my school -- so the cycle of "touching, forelpay and eventually, anal sex" has whirled for 40 years. I asked my father about this, he was quick enough to deny this -- that "quick enough to deny" is the reason why I strongly suspect it occured during that period ...
In 1988, the Deaf President Now Movement exploded in Washington, DC -- its ripple effect in Deaf empowerment shook the foundations of Deaf schools' systems across the nation. The social impact from the Movement jolted the Deaf communities across the globe that one has to stand up and kick the hearies back to the corner and take over what is rightfully ours.
More and more Deaf persons are taking over the higher positions and changed the policies that meets the deaf students' needs, not hearies' needs. Slowly, the secrets of the abuses began to emerge from the darkness. It is not pretty sight.
But at least, Governor Baxter School for the Deaf in Portland, Maine is doing something about it.
Check this link. Dr. Robert Kelly I s Going To Hell!
It is interesting to see the picture of cheering alumnus. Very liberating experience, I bet.
R-
Interesting Tidbit
You know, NYU has 24/7 Library. Gallaudet should have one like that. Sometimes at 4 AM when I was wired and restless, I wanted to scourge the books to build a massive, warped and yet so complicated knowledge of everything ... trying to best Einstein ... but I failed. Thanks to Gallaudet, I'm bit dumber than ever. ;-)
Enjoy this article. I was the VEE at that dude. You can surf his blog as well.
Homeless at NYU!! and his own blog.
R-
Enjoy this article. I was the VEE at that dude. You can surf his blog as well.
Homeless at NYU!! and his own blog.
R-
Monday, April 26, 2004
The Restaurant ...
I was watching "The Restaurant" on NBC, it was quite a drama between Rocco and Jeffrey. Jeffrey is a stud. Rocco is fuckin' arrogant that you can find in Chelsea, lying through his yellow teeth to get what he wanted. But that is not the topic I wanted to tell ...
About five or six years ago, a group of six or seven went to Pizzeria Uno's in Union Station in the District. Among the group was Lester, a 6'8 foot tall dude ... it was a simple thing that turned into a drama that embarrassed everyone else in the process.
We had our orders done and Lester was hungry and waiting impatiently for his food to arrive. The lady was carrying a huge plate that held food dishes on her shoulder and her right hand to balance the plate. As she began to put the dishes down one-by-one ... Lester was impatient and he was taller enough to see his dish on the plate, he took it off the huge plate.
Big mistake.
The lady lost control of her huge plate and tipped the plate towards our table and destroyed our food -- the lady was so pissed off at Lester as he held his plate. He looked like, "Did I do this? But I did not mean to do this!"
It was such a spectacle yet so embarrassing.
Yes, I had to wait another 20 minutes of dinner.
R-
About five or six years ago, a group of six or seven went to Pizzeria Uno's in Union Station in the District. Among the group was Lester, a 6'8 foot tall dude ... it was a simple thing that turned into a drama that embarrassed everyone else in the process.
We had our orders done and Lester was hungry and waiting impatiently for his food to arrive. The lady was carrying a huge plate that held food dishes on her shoulder and her right hand to balance the plate. As she began to put the dishes down one-by-one ... Lester was impatient and he was taller enough to see his dish on the plate, he took it off the huge plate.
Big mistake.
The lady lost control of her huge plate and tipped the plate towards our table and destroyed our food -- the lady was so pissed off at Lester as he held his plate. He looked like, "Did I do this? But I did not mean to do this!"
It was such a spectacle yet so embarrassing.
Yes, I had to wait another 20 minutes of dinner.
R-
To Hex ...
Hex, Hex, what did I do to you? I always thought you were strange and weird but that is your style. I never badmouthed or backstabbed you. I tried to be nice towards you because you did not do anything wrong.
But you crossed the line when you badmouthed me to your so-called Christian friends who associated with that old geezer husband of yours. It is silly, my dear.
you're weird, and always will be. that's why you married him.
R-
But you crossed the line when you badmouthed me to your so-called Christian friends who associated with that old geezer husband of yours. It is silly, my dear.
you're weird, and always will be. that's why you married him.
R-
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