Tried This, Never Will Try Again

Today, I decided that I needed a haircut since the thick hair on the back of my skull made it difficult for me to sleep well. So after talking with Perlis about having a haircut, I decided to risk myself to a local barber shop which I can see that it is full of hispanic folks. Perlis said they're not "that" bad, but it's alright.

I thought that it'd be a good experience to get a haircut from different places. So I went around the block to a local barber shop. When I entered the premise, the folks who worked there seemed to be stunned that a caucasian with thick hair is in their shop. One taller African American barber asked me by voice, I gestured that I'm Deaf. He gestured, "Cut?" I nodded, he smiled and was bit puzzled but told me to sit.

This is obviously a Dominican Republic-style barber shop -- everyone practically shouted at each other. Even the workers' kids run rampant around the shop. That was OK with me. I wrote down on the paper pad, asking the barber that I'd like my sides to be trimmed as much as a half-inch and that the top of my head has to remain more than 1 or 2 inch long.

Gave it to the same African American barber, he is big -- kinda intimidating but you can tell that he is bit goofy and jolly. He reads it and nodded. Shortly, he ordered me to sit down.

I felt something is wrong with it as he buzzed the cutter machine (Don't know how to spell it, though!) against the skin of my right side. I was stunned when he pulled off, it is not half-inch, it is practically hairless! I panicked and told him to give me the paper pad and pointed to the instruction -- he wrote one word: Mushroom!

Oh, fuck. Then he threw the paper pad over on the counter and gestured me to be quiet. I grimaced. He totally buzzed all sides. I could not believe it -- I growled, he pulled off and said in very condescending tone with a gesture to silence me and implied that he knew his job and for me to be quiet.

After 25 minutes of destroying my hair, I was speechless. I looked like 4 years old kid, Hairless on all sides, but 1 1/2 inch on the top -- practically making me a "mushroom" guy. I paid him for his service, no tip. Fuck him. I walked back home, people were staring at me. I felt so stupid.

Perlis saw it and was horrified and said, "I don't like this -- you have to do it again tomorrow!"

I intend to. I may end up looking a jarhead by the end of Easter Sunday, anyway! Sempfer Fi!

R-